Coffeemonk

Storytime: Strawberry Shortcake: Christmas is Here!

It’s been a while since I’ve posted one of these, so let’s have a little refresher.

cd jewel case insertWhen my niece was born, I decided that I wanted to do something original, creative, and personal for her each year for Christmas. Since she was living overseas, and I knew I might only get to see her (and therefore to share a book with her) a few times a year at best, I struck on the idea of doing an audio CD of me reading some of my favorite children’s stories to her. Thus: Storytime.

In 2006, for my third CD, I had a couple realizations—first, that there are only so many kids books I consider “favorites”, and second, that my niece, being a girl, would be more interested in “girl” stories than the “boy” stories I used to read. So, I would have to branch out into unfamiliar, and at times, uncomfortable territory. Case in point, our first track from 2006.

I picked Christmas is Here! (at my wife’s prompting, I’m sure) because it’s a Christmas story, and because girls love Strawberry Shortcake.

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My Linux-based, Multi-platform Photography Workflow

Lightroom screenshot blended with photoOne of the chief struggles for an amateur photography enthusiast, apart from developing your skill as a photographer, is figuring out how best to manage your ever-growing collection1. Importing, naming, securing, processing, and filtering thousands of photos often requires sophisticated planning and a stable workflow.

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Storytime: The Velveteen Rabbit

Storytime: The Velveteen RabbitThe third and final reading from the 2005 Christmas CD is one of my most favorite stories. As a kid, when I first encountered this story—I think as an “after-school special” type thing, it hit some strong emotional chords with me. I’m not entirely sure why, but I remember this story as the first that actually made me cry. (Old Yeller worked it’s magic on me years later…)

The Velveteen Rabbit is a cute little story about a stuffed, toy rabbit who longs to be “real.” Initially of little interest to his owner, or to the other toys with whom he is thrown together, eventually the rabbit becomes the much-loved favorite of the boy. After the boy contracts an illness which requires the purging of those belongings he keeps closest to him, the rabbit is thrown out of the house, to be incinerated. Filled with love for the boy, and sadness at their separation, the rabbit’s single tear summons the “toy fairy,” who completes his transformation and deposits him in the forest among the other real rabbits.

Storytime: Uncle Matt 2005 CD BackThe 2005 CD may’ve been shorter, but that was ok ’cause it had this story on it. Also, I managed to sneak Spidey into the CD jacket, which was fun.

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Storytime: The Night Before Christmas

Storytime: The Night Before Christmas Since the object of the project is to make a Christmas present, it’s kind of imperative to include at least a few outright Christmas stories in the mix. And what story (well, secular story, anyway) is more a part of Christmas than the long poem, The Night Before Christmas.

This classic story includes references which modern kids will likely never be exposed to elsewhere—like actual shutters, kerchief and caps as sleepwear, and sugarplums. Of course, this story also is one of the primary introductions for children to Santa’s peculiar attributes, and also has an easy to memorize roster of Santa’s pre-Rudolph reindeer.

There are many stories and songs about Santa and his reindeer, but this is one of the absolute fundamental texts of Santology.

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Storytime: Guess How Much I Love You

Uncle Matt Reads: 2005 CD CoverThe 2005 CD wasn’t actually completed until 2006, and only included three books, one of which was the longer but much beloved Velveteen Rabbit. (It is kind of sad when time and timeliness become a factor in the creation of a Christmas present… but it was in this instance. I’ve tried to be better about it since then, to greater and lesser effect.)

The first track I’d like to feature from this CD is the short—but very cute—Guess How Much I Love You, by Sam McBratney and Anita Jeram.

Guess How Much I Love YouThis story documents a peculiar exchange between a narcissistic elder bunny and an insecure but effusive younger bunny who share a vague and unhealthily competitive relationship, and who apparently belong to a cult which has stripped them of their names and only allows them to be referenced by the color of their fur.

As the story progresses, the junior bunny attempts to elucidate the magnitude of his devotion to the elder bunny, but with each new platitude, the elder bunny is compelled to explain that his devotion to the younger bunny is actually the greater. He accomplishes this through various means, including physical feats of strength and simple size-related intimidation techniques. In the end, the elder bunny—not content to allow the youngster even the smallest victory—must get in the last word, even as his companion loses consciousness. One imagines the elder bunny smiling to himself with smug satisfaction, before dropping off to a fitful, horror-filled sleep.

 

Too much?

[UPDATE: 1 hour after this post launched, I realized I'd neglected to include the audio. Whoops.]

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